Part 2: Annhilation
|
Ben |
|
Halo Marines |
|
Alon and Tobias |
|
Metal Gear Solid 2 |
|
Rob and Andrew |
|
Final Fantasy X |
|
Classi, Gary and Trevor |
|
Super Smash Bros |
Narrator: Accepting the Tanaka's challenge the X-Force are split into teams to fight their respective opponents. However things go horribly wrong when...
(Ben dodges a blast and leaps several kilometers behind a boulder to catch his breath)
Ben: Phew at least I have
a few minutes before the tanks catch up with me... something's not natural
here, my powers seem to have no effect on them...
(Shell bursts)
Ben: ARGH! And their weapons
cracked my armor! (Pulls out the NavCon) Hmmm... weird there is Circuit
Stone energy signatures but I didn't bring the circuit stone I stole from
the Maverick Hunters*...
(*New X-Force #19)
(Ben looks over the to see the Halo troops are approaching)
Ben: (Got to think fast)
SHAZAM! (Transforms into Pyro Da Fox)
(Master Chief jumps out)
Master Chief: FREEZE!
Marine 1: Hey that's
not Magma Dragoon...
Master Chief: No shit sherlock...
Hey fox boy where's that damn robot we've been chasing?
Ben: Uh, he teleported
off to the Red Plateau...
Marine 2: Impossible
the Tanakas made it impossible to use their teleporters!
Ben: They did what?
Marine 2: Yeah and using
their technology we have force fields and enhanced...
Master Chief: Ix-nay! Civilian
in the radius...
Marine 2: Oh sorry heh,
just kidding...
Master Chief: MC to Chansu...
open teleporter to Red Plateau...
(Teleporter door opens up and as soon as the last Halo Marine leaves)
Ben: Suckers... *sniff*
hmmmm... I smell the toil and sweat of two lackluster game developers nearby...
(Runs toward that smell)
Meanwhile on Big Shell...
Fortune: Kill me!
(Alon and Tobias run)
Tobias: Why didn't you tell
Tobias that this psychotic bitch is sudicidal and homocidal!
Alon: That's the good news,
the worst is that she CAN'T DIE!
Fortune: KILL ME!
Raiden: Hello boys...
Alon: *Sigh* this little
prick...
Raiden: Hey my VR training makes me the ultimate warrior in fact I'll slice you...
(Cell phone rings)
Raiden: (Sweat drop) Oh heh excuse me for a minute... Hello? ...Rose? ...Listen this isn't a good time now. Of course it is never that way...
Alon and Tobias: ...
Alon: Want me to kill him?
Tobias: If you won't, Tobias
will...
Raiden: I love you but I'm about to...
(Alon's foot slams onto Raiden but a force field his keeping him from crushing Raiden)
Tobias: Hold on a minute...
(Scans Raiden and finds his force field) Alon, he has a force field!
Alon: Oh really? *Grunt*
What was you first clue?
Tobias: It's reaching maximum
tension keep at it...
Raiden: You fools you think the X-Force *groan* can win this one? Ha the Tanakas equiped us all with these so we could...
SPLAT!
Tobias: ALON! He was going to
blow the whole plan!
Alon: Who cares all what
I have to do is...
???: Hello boys...
(Tobias and Alon turn around)
Fortune: Miss me big boys?
Revolver: Heh, heh, heh...
any last words...
Vamp: ...What? You expecting
me to say something?
Alon: Uh oh...
Tobias: Mommy!
Meanwhile...
Rob: RIP CLAW!
Andrew: AIMING LASER!
(They bounce off of the Final Fantasy characters aimlessly)
Lulu: (Casts a force spell
knocking both into the mountain side) Really boys? Your attacks are so
clumsy...
(Tidus and Wakka start attacking both but Rob presses on holding both off)
Tidus: Yee-haw!
Wakka: Blitzball FOREVER!
Rob: (Kicks Wakka in the
face and roundhouse kicks Tidus) (I can't hold them off forever why do
our attacks bounce off them? As long as they're drunk they can't be paralyzed
by pain)
(Throws Tidus and Wakka into the group)
Rob: Andrew? (Looks to find
Andrew pale) Oh my god? Why aren't you attacking?
Andrew: Can't... you...
see...? It's hopeless... need Gary's spores for comfort....
Rob: Oh shit...
Elsewhere the rest find themselves surrounded...
Trevor: Ground Hunter! (Blasts
Donkey Kong in the chest staggering the giant ape) It's no use their using
force fields...
Classi: (Wraps
up Samus in her webbing and throws her into the advancing Bowser and Mewtwo...)
Don't despair Trevor hun, there is a way there must be...
Gary: I knew Hsu and
Chan had to be cheating, you would think they'd forget the way we humiliated
them...
(The trio find themselve hopelessly surrounded)
Gary: Oy vey...
Narrator: All seems lost you say? Banish the thought even with the X-Force on the verge of defeat there is one member who is left free plus he he has help coming...
Ben: Typical a base
built into the mountain, Well it looks like the Tanaka brothers are using
the circuit stones to power up our opponents...
???: Hey do you know the way to Mechanopolis?
Ben: Beat from Jet Grind
Radio?
Beat: Yo! That's me so do you
know where it is I heard they allow me to use my "artistic skills"...
Ben: Well if I tell
you will you help me?
Beat: That depends...
Ben: It involves breaking
the rules...
Beat: Awesome! Count me in...
And so inside the Tanaka's box seats...
Hsu: We're geniuses aren't we,
we'll finally have our revenge...
Chan: As much as I hate to admit.
I enjoy seeing the X-Force having their collective asses kicked except
Magma Dragoon, he disappeared he didn't find him on the Red Plateau...
Hsu: Oh well at least that was
the genius of our plan... using the circuit stones for their power. Could
there be a chance that Magma Dragoon knows that our based is in is "stadium"?
(Ben and Beat sneak past them undetected)
Hsu and Chan: Nah...
And so in the circuit stone power core...
Beat: Dude! Look at the size
of that core... What are you going to do?
Ben: (Breaks open the
power core with a force beam) Steal these... (Holds out a Circuit Stone)
here... loads several into Beat's arms...
Beat: Isn't this illegal?
Ben: As much as your
profession is... hurry let's go before it powers down...
(Both speed down the corridor at unimaginable speed...)
(Hsu and Chan box seats)
Hsu: One day they'll erect a shrine
to us and our gaming genius...
Chan: And that we did what none
could do... defeat the X-Force through proxy...
Hsu: Things are starting to look
up for us...
(Lights black out)
(Ben and Beat zoom past)
Hsu: Wha? (Zips out) STOP THIEF!
Chan: To the golf cart!
(Hsu and Chan jump into the golf kart and chase the speeding fox and teen)
Beat: OH MY GOD THEY'RE GAINING
ON US...
Ben: Don't go ballistic
on me now... CHAOS CONTROL!
(As the speed towards the end of the line... they disappear)
(As Hsu and Chan speed towards the wall)
Hsu: HIT THE BREAKS!
Both: (Jump out as the cart smashes into the wall and explodes Hollywood-style)
Hsu: And I thought that sucker
was electric...
Chan: *cough* it was... Who was
that fox?
Hsu: I don't know brother and
I don't want to know...
Narrator: And so in Mechanopolis, Beat separates on his own accord and Ben along with his son Chibi MD head towards the Circuit Stone shrine...
Chibi: Daddy! Where are we
headed...
Ben: To a place I never
shown anyone... Hey aren't you supposed to be with the nanny?
Chibi: Yeah, but I ate her
while she was sleeping...
Ben: Now what did I tell
you about eating old bags?
Chibi: They're full of fat...
*sigh*
(Both enter the shrine where Ben places each stone on a pedistal)
Ben: Hmmm... I wonder what
happened to the seventh Cicuit Stone... ah, I have more pressing matters
to attend to... (Calls the holovids of the battles all of the X-Force are
near-beaten) SHIT! The force fields are down but the X-Force can't take
any more punishment...
(The Circuit Stones start to glow...)
(Cue catchy theme music)
(The Circuit Stone give Ben a jolt of energy...)
MAGMA DRAGOON PERFECT! The Fires of Compassion!
Chibi: Whoa! What happened?
Ben: Apparently the
jolt of energy flooded my Quantum Driver with excess energy so I could
transform into my next form...
Chibi: Huh?
Ben: The stones gave
me an energy boost...
Chibi: Daddy, you scare me...
Ben: Sometimes I scare
myyself, now to the task at hand... CHAOS CONTROL!!!
(Ben starts appearing over the respective battlegrounds)
Rob: Look!
Trevor: What is it?
Classi: Ben hun.. is that
you?
Ben: I know it my look
like I'm hovering above you but I'm actually in Mechanopolis and I can
confirm that this is a trap set up by Hsu and Chan and I know you're almost
at the breaking point but I hope this will help you...
(Ben shoot beams of colored energy towards the X-Force...)
Rob: My strength it's...
Alon: Returning...
Trevor: In fact I feel...
Gary: Stronger...
Ben: GU-AH! (disappears)
Mechanopolis...
Chibi: Dad! Are you all right?
Ben: Thanks for asking
but you should worry about the Super Smash Brothers.. Can you say "hammer
time"?
Big Shell...
(Tobias blasts Fortune with his whirlwind throwing her through the walls)
Tobias: Who's your daddy Fortune?!?
(Fires his Razor Wings)
(They all curve away from Fortune)
Tobias: Shit...
Alon: Maybe this will do
the trick... (Charges and punches Fortune through the exterior wall because
of her curse she falls like a leaf towards the sea)
(Tobias flies out to finish off Fortune)
Fortune: Eeeeeeeee... *KRAK!*
ARGH!
(Tobias does another lightning speed turn around and punches Fortune square in the jaw)
Fortune: Ugh...
Tobias: You know what they say
payback is a bitch eh?
(Tobias fires his cannon and throws Fortune into the ice-cold sea at and imcredible speed...)
SPLASH!
Tobias: If you ask Tobias, Tobias
thinks it's easy...
(Meanwhile on Big Shell)
(Alon faces off against Vamp but Vamps to fast for him)
Vamp: What's the matter fat
boy? *ZIP!* Can't catch me?
(Solid Snake jumps out and blast Vamp apart with his M4)
Alon: Finally I get some
luck!
Snake: Not this time
big boy...
Alon: What? But you...
Snake: The Philantropists
need that $25 million so I have to kill you to collect my... (Gets shot
in the head)
(Tobias flies back in)
Tobias: What the...
Revolver: That damn Snake
could never shut up... Now to collect my $25 million...
Tobias: You bastard!
Revolver: Any last... (hesitates)
... Get out of my head! (Hand starts to hold his revolver to his head)...
GET OUT OF MY... *BAM!* collaspes to the floor dead)
Alon: What a revloting development
this was all a twisted web of treachery and decit...
Tobias: Yeah talk about convulted...
(Both look at writer)
Ben (Realworld): Hey! I'm trying to fix that!
Alon and Tobias: Uh-huh...
(Teleporter door opens and they walk through it)
X-FORCE vs. METAL GEAR SOLID 2 - X-Force Wins!
Final Fantasy Realm...
(While holding hold Auron with one blade Rob flirts with Yuna)
Rob: So what do you say
baby? You leave these losers and I can show you the time of your life...
Yuna: Beat it dirtbag...
(Rob swipes his claws at her and her head falls to pieces)
Auron: You bastard! You
killed our healer!
Rob: ...and you, it wouldn't
have made a difference anyway...
Auron: It's not fair...
*grunt* (Uses all his strength dissipate Rob's energy blade)
Rob: Yeah you aren't made
of Adamantium alloy and my endurance far excceds yours..
(Quickly creating two energy claws Rob rips Auron apart from the chest)
(Tidus and Wakka then charge towards Rob distracting him)
Lulu: Now that's he's preoccupied
with those two now to use my ultimate spell...
Andrew: (Comes to) NO!!!
(Andrew uses his Tail Blade attack and and pirece Lulu)
Lulu: *choke*
Rob: DOUBLE SLASHER!
(The Slashers rip Tidus and Wakka into two pieces)
(Rob turns to Lulu)
Rob: Now your turn!
Lulu: *wheeze*
(A red line races from the top of Lulu's head down her neck then she splits vertically)
Andrew: Yes I got her...
Did you see that? I ROCK!
Rob: *sigh*
(Teleporter door opens and Rob drags Andrew through it)
X-FORCE vs. FINAL FANTASY X - X-Force Wins!
The Tanakas Box Seats...
Chan: Brother Hsu the X-Force
has made an amazing recovery...
Hsu: Impossible! There's no way
they could regained they're impetus... the traps we set...
Chan: Have failed miserably,
at least there's one hope. The Super Smash Brothers...
Pokemon Stadium...
(Trevor blasts Donkey Kong with Ground Hunter again blasting the ape to pieces)
Gary: (Faces the Ice Climbers)
Hehehehehe... SHAZAM! (Turns to his Ice Man form) Wanna see whos the better
eskimo?
Nana: Bring it on shorty!
(Both Ice Climbers jump and try whack Gary with their hammers but he somersaults and dodges their attack...)
Gary: Oh come on that's
kid's stuff...
Nana: Oh sue us we
haven't been in a game of our own since ninteen eighty frickin' five!
Gary: Well junior prepare
for this... (Pulls out Mallet)
(Gary uses his mallet to pummel the Ice Climbers to a bruised and broken sags of bones)
Announcer: 1047-Hit INSANITY!
Gary: (Bows) Thank you !
Thank you...
Samus: (Blasts Gary but he
dodges and turns back into Split Mushroom) Are you finished yapping?
Gary: Hey! Over here!
Samus: There you are...
Gary 2: Hey over here!
Samus: (Looks over at the
hologram)
Gary 3: Is that armor still
in season?
Gary 4: (Jumps into her arms)
MARRY ME SAMUS!
Samus: (Confused) Wha? Uh...
(A web of electricity hit her helmet) Eeeeeeeeeee... (Helmet explodes)
Classi: Oops! I think I
overshot the roof...
Gary: That was perfect...
Classi: (Hugs and squeezes
Gary) Awww... my Icey-kins...
Bowser: Did you forget about
me children?
Classi: (Surprised) EEEEEE!...
(Squeezes Gary tighter)
Gary: ACK! (raspy) I need oxygen...
then again I don't... ACK!
(Ben come rushing in and uses his Vulcan Hammer attack on Bowser smashing Bowsers shell and hits the stadium wall)
Trevor: BEN! You made it...
ooh nice makeover...
Ben: With a little
help... (Points to Chibi MD who is fighting Ness)
Ness: ARGH! Get this little
pshyco off of me!
(Chibi snaps his neck and goes after Mr. Game and Watch... )
Mario: Hey! Super Smash Brothers
Rally...
(The Super Smash Bros. try to thrust themselves onto the five mavericks)
Ben: Trevor take to
the skay and flank em'... (a blade of red-hot energy forms on Ben's right
arm) Hyper Magma Blade!
Trevor: Ground Hunter!
(Ben's Hyper Magma Blade cuts through the center of the SSB while Trevors Grounds Hunter takes out the left and right flanks leaving one left)
Classi and Gary: Whoa!
Chibi: That's my dad! (Jumps
up and down)
Mario: (Cowering) Please...
I surrender...
Ben: That's all right...
(Takes Mario by the neck then by the arms and legs)
Mario: Wha? What are you doin'?
Ben: From a Sega fan
to Nintendo mascot...
(Ben snaps Marios spine over his knee)
Gary: Eck! Gruesome...
Chibi: (Runs up and hugs Ben's
legs) You're the most kick-ass dad ever...
Ben: (Transforms back to
normal Magma Dragoon) Don't expect me to go soft yet...
Classi: I bet I can change
that...
(Teleporter Door opens)
Trevor: So it's over just
like that...
Ben: Well that's always
a good way to end a day, and apparently "Cheaters always prosper" after
all.
(They all walk through it)
X-FORCE vs. SUPER SMASH BROS. MELEE - X-Force Wins!
Tanaka's Box Seats...
Hsu: ...
Chan: ...
Hsu: We lost... again... can't...
take... this...
Chan: Oh no not again...
Hsu: (Sputters) ARGH! No one can
harm me! I AM GOD!
Chan: Brother Hsu, just calm
down...
Hsu: YOU ARE CONSPIRING AGAINST
ME! I AM YOUR OVERLORD!
![]()
Chan: Please we can't go through
this again...
Hsu: I can't understand if I'm
god why can't I defeat the X-Force. THEY MUST BE CHEATING!
(Kid walks in)
Kid: Mr. Tanaka, those battles were so kick ass! I hope you do it again next year...
Hsu: ...
(Hsu seizes the kid)
Hsu: I demand a sacrifice!!!
Kid: Eeeeeeeee!
(Hsu is out cold)
Kid: ...
Chan: Sorry my child but my brother
has cracked under the shock of our defeat. No matter it was a fun endeavor
nonetheless... this is Chan Tanaka and I apologize to our fans for delaying
Roller Death Derby 6...
Mechanopolis... Andrew's Laboratory...
Narrator: With Gary back in his timeline in 20XX, Trevor brushing up of his SSBM skills and Classi babysitting Chibi. Andrew examines the other four members of the X-Force to examine the effects of the power boost Ben gave them...
Andrew: Hmmmm....
Ben: What is it?
Andrew: It appears that
you sacrificed a large portion of your chaos abilities when you activated
your Chaos Control...
Ben: I know that already...
but what effect did it have on us...
Rob: Yeah I feel so different...
Andrew: Apparently the portion
of the Chaos Abilities he gave us connected our Quantum Drivers to the
Circuit Stones. So that means we'll probably be able to change into more
powerful forms like Ben did today...
Alon: Whoa kick ass...
Tobias: Yeah Tobias can hardly
wait to discover Tobias' "Perfect" form...
Andrew: Did I tell you guys
how I sliced Lulu in half?
All: YES!
Rob: A dozen times... here
Gary wanted you to have this... (Pulls out a jar of a purple powder)
Andrew: SPORES! (Opens it
and sniffs it) Ugh... (Stiffens up like a board)(Falls to the ground)
Ben: Whew! If I heard that
one more time I would've killed him...
Alon: Too bad we couldn't
collect that $25 million...
Rob: Ah, it's not like we
needed it anyway...
Alon: I guess...
Ben: Ah who cares! Who wants
to go to the pub with me, this kid named Beat told me about this drinking
game...
All: Hell yeah!
Narrator: Oops I almost forgot...
Master Chief: Where is that
son of a bitch? We've been wandering for hours and no sign of that Magma
Dragoon.
Marine 1: Isn't it possible
that fox lied to us?
Master Chief: Something
that cute? Bite your...
Marine 2: Master Chief,
foxes are known for sending hunters on a wild goose chase...
(Silence)
Master Chief: DAMN YOU FOX!
DAMN YOU TO HELL!
X-FORCE vs. HALO - You be the judge...
END!